Favorite Reporter

Favorite Reporter

Thursday, April 2, 2015

mmmm. pie. mmmmmm

Well the season is wrapping up…time to pull the golf clubs out of the garden shed, time to stick the brooms into the cellar and write another blog!

First – some curling gossip and random thoughts:
(in an effort to be hip - I have included some hashtags (#) to try to appear cool to younger curlers #lameattempt.

- Martin Ferland and Phil Lemay are stepping back for a year! They are taking a break to recharge their batteries. The rest of the team will pick up a body and keep at it! #fakeretirement
- My crazy mix of Saguenay curlers and a Montreal Anglophone is back at it for another season. (unless they have fired me and have not told me yet!) #3bloquesetunbleuet
- What is up with Pat Simmons? When did he get good? Was he always good and we just did not notice?  #cinderellastory
-The US Team at the Worlds might not win that often, but its pretty cool that they have Ned Flanders playing second. #okleydokely
- I will keep my ear to the ground at the Glenmore Intermediate this weekend to bring my loyal readers any breaking news.  By ear to the ground, I mean that I will likely pass out and actually have my ear on the ground at some point.  #jelloshooters
- WTF is going on in Ontario? Just about every team changed. The guy who won the friggin’ province (Mark Kean) could not convince one of his teammates to stick with him. My man-crush Greg Balsdon is not playing with the Bices. Glenn Howard is treating next year like #TBT – with both Middaugh and Hart playing for him. Maybe Russ should skip!!! Is Ed Werenich the 5th?  #sweepwithhammers  
-  Glad to see Max Elmalah winning the Mixed in Quebec – with a very nice team. They will represent us well. #MikeKennedydidnotwin?
- Apparently Mixed Doubles is going to be in the next Winter Olympics. I still maintain that Mixed Doubles is what you should order at the bar after a curling game – but if there is an Olympic spot on the line in what seems to be a pretty random game, then I might have to try out! As long as nobody expects me to sweep my own friggin’ rock – that’s just plain wrong.  #doubleryeandcokeplease
- Curious to see if any of the BIG teams will break up – after a few very disappointing seasons. (Koe?) #firelaing


Some thoughts on my last blog:
I read the Jill Officer post about all the mean shit that people posted about Team Jones after their loss in the World Finals. Shameful stuff. Good on Jill for taking it on.
It did get me feeling somewhat guilty about my last blog where I  hated on Brad Jacobs and Team. I will say that my intention was to point out that this team has become hated by some of the curling world (in the way that people hate the Boston Bruins). I might have got a bit too personal in my usual search for entertainment, and maybe a bit too preachy in my quest to save curling from itself. If I went too far, than I am sorry. And trust me when I say it is really not personal. I do not know these guys at all of the ice.
I do not hate any of those dudes personally. Yes, they may look like the kind of guys who make you want to leave the gym when they show up – but for goodness sake they are CURLERS – so they cannot be that bad in my books.


Still not a big fan of the over-the-top MMA-like celebrations. But in the name of giving it a chance, my club team did a  “Team Jacobs Celebration Impersonation Night” in our last ladder game! My skip made an half-open hit for two in the 1st end, and we went CRAZY. Fist pumps. CMONs! I have to admit, it did feel kinda good. It was liberating -  like running naked on the beach. But on the downside - we looked retarded. Our opposition, Mike Kennedy, was not impressed. It might have worked better if I actually had biceps.


A big thanks to Evan Mooney and the good folks from Lennoxville curling club for inviting me to be a guest speaker at the “Pie Spiel” banquet. It was such a great experience. If you need a reminder of what curling is all about, pick up a few guys and sign up for this spiel next year. Entry fee is all of $160. The highlight of the spiel is an awesome roast beef lunch – which is followed by dessert:  about 100 home-made pies. The pies alone are worth the $160.  They had every pie imaginable. I am glad my awesome Hardline Curling Pants (shameless sponsor plug!) have enough stretch in the waist!

mmmm. Pie.


  1. Loved that spiel! We were also marched through "downtown" Lennoxville on the Saturday morning as I recall! Did you try the Humble pie? ;-)

  2. The country is bankrupt.


    Glen Howard has announced that he will never retire and that Vic Rauter will play third for him with Randy Ferbey at lead and Kevin Martin at 2nd next year.

    Brad Gushue says he will stop using the F word when Brett Gallant can throw a rock with the correct weight which he admits will never happen.

    A new curling device, entitled the 'The Jennifer Jones Hearing Aid' will be distributed to all curling fans after their hearing is destroyed.

    Reid Carruthers will again stop Mike McEwen from going to the Brier and then Reid will lose every single game in the brier just to torture Mike McEwen

    The Brier will be renamed 'Free Beer' and will sellout every night.

    Team Jacobs will be tested for anabolic steroids abuse after Brad lifts a rock over his head and screams "Now I crush you all..."

    This message will be deleted in 15 minutes...

  4. Will your post be deleted, I don't know. Not that I could care much. Hey buddy, you seem to have a lot of free time, think you are funny and you know it all... Why don't you write your own blog and those of us who think that you deserve the time to read it will gladly join.

  5. It is now proven that Mike McEwen is the greatest choker in the history of sports.

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