Let the Curling Wash Over Me

 

OMG there is curling on TV. I am 11/10 excited to leave for the Brier in a few weeks, but for the next 10 days I will be watching the Scotties Tournament of Hearts Women’s Canadian Curling Championship.

Seriously, I have never been so excited to watch women’s curling in my life. In a normal year, I would watch the Scotties selectively, watching only the occasional game during the week and then most of the playoffs. But this year is different. I am not likely to leave my house very often in the next few weeks, so there will pretty much always be curling on for three draws a day, even if only in the background as I work.

I could be wrong, but there seems to be an insane level of anticipation and social media buzz around this year's event. I mentioned in an earlier blog that this coudl be the most watched Season of Champions ever, as this is providing welcome relief to the curling world which has essentially not had a lot to feel good about in  awhile.

This just feels good.

***

What should we expect as fans?

The Atmosphere:

First of all, this event will be in the bubble. It will be weird. There will be cardboard cut-outs of fans instead of fans, and cardboard cut-outs don’t cheer great shots. There will be no 5^th end interview. There will be no handshakes, no patch or lounge, and no SOCIABLE.

But I think it will work. Most curlers have spent most of their lives curling in clubs, where the fans are usually on the other side of a window. Will it be that different to have them watching on TV instead? I think once the curling starts, it will feel normal for the players. It might not feel like the Scotties, but it will feel like a curling tournament.

Will it be as cool as a normal Scotties? No.

Is it a million times cooler than what most of us have been doing for the last 11-12 months? Hell yes.

BTW -  I absolutely love the uniforms. Dynasty curling has done a crazy job re-creating a vintage curling look with modern materials. I await my box of unis with bated breath, hoping that the men’s designs are as cool.  

 The format

This year the event features 18 teams, as Curling Canada did not want to leave anyone out during the pandemic. Strangely it did end up excluding a couple of big name teams in Kelsey Rocque and Robyn Sylvernagle, who were left on the sidelines because they had just shuffled their teams prior to the season. Unfortunate for them.

The field of 18 is split into two pools of 9. The top 4 advance to next stage where they play the top 4 from the other division. Then the top 3 end up in the playoffs. No paige this year.

Who are the favorites?

The Big 4: Einerson, Jones, Homan and Fleury. It will be tough for anyone other than the top 4 to win this week. I would give 10-1 odds against someone outside the top 4 winning. (if I were the kind of person that bets on curling!)

• Tough to bet against Einerson wining. They looked great last year, winning in dramatic fashion in an extra end over Rachel Homan. They are without a doubt the odds-on favorite.
• Rachel Homan would normally be my pick, but she finds herself 7 months pregnant at the event this year. I honestly have no idea how this will affect her. I played a Mixed Provincial with my wife who was 5 months pregnant at the time playing lead, and she played well except for having to pee about every 10 minutes during the game.
• Fleury/Carey: Tough to bet on a team that has never played a game together, but weirder things have happened. Carey is a pro and can likely take over and start playing well from the 1^st minute. The strange fact is that when you pickup a new player, there is usually a honeymoon period before you get on each others’ nerves. Sometimes new is an advantage.
• Jennifer Jones: JJ will surely be around for the playoffs. I think their experience will pay off in this wacky environment.

Other storylines:

• Eager to see Zacharias, the junior champ from Manitoba. Despite their lofty pedigree, I think they will find it tough, and will take a bit longer to get going. They have very little experience in women’s curling, and the Scotties ain’t juniors.
• I will be cheering hard for Laurie St-Georges. They are good people. They work as hard as any team I have ever seen. They are as dedicated as any team I have ever seen. There is no doubt that they will be good and will contend, it is just a question of when. It might be a bit soon to expect that for this year, but this is a great no-risk chance to learn and get better. I can’t wait to watch them.
• Laura Walker is a bit of an unknown, but I am always partial to tattooed toe-tuckers. I rank them just outside of the top 4, and likely to make the final 8.
• Kerry Galusha will surprise some teams. They are playing well since adding Joanne Rizzo to the mix, and they have actually curled a few games this year!
• I hope that a team from the Atlantic provinces does well, if only because they will be forced to quarantine for 2 weeks when they get home! Suzanne Birt and Jill Brothers have the most potential to crack the final 8.

Who wins?

I pick Jennifer Jones to use her experience and guile to beat Einerson in the final, 7-6.

 

Update on MY TEAM as we prepare for the Brier:

Unfortunately, restrictions in Quebec have limited our ability to practice in Montreal and Quebec City since the 8^th of January. I am still forced to be the #practiceninja, stalking outdoor rinks and abandoned curling clubs to find ice to practice on. More to come on this in a future blog.

In the meantime, we will sit back and enjoy some curling for the first time in forever. It was almost a year ago that I was at the Brier in Kingston, (unfortunately in the stands, not on the ice), just before all things fun and sociable came to an abrupt end. I miss it deerly, and this week already feels like a much needed return to fun.

So tonight I will pour myself a rye and coke, make some popcorn and surrender to the dulcet tones of Cheryl and Russ talking strategy. I will let the syrupy-smooth voice of Vic Rauter wash over me, covering me like a heavy blanket on a cold day.

Make the final...

Bubble bound - and Beware the Practice Ninja

 

I am off to the Bubble Brier! Team Fournier - aka the Horses - has been selected to represent Quebec at the 2021 Brier to be held in Calgary March 5-14.  

The whole thing has a very surreal feeling to it. I have to admit that I really wanted this. I know I am not alone in finding the pandemic tough, but being picked to curl in a Brier seems like the first good news that I have heard in a long time. Of course, I would rather have won my way there, but given the circumstances, I will take what I can get.

Why were we chosen? The process defined by Curling Quebec was to rely on a committee of experts to pick "the best" team from a list of applicants. I am guessing that the fact that we have been the #1 ranked team in the province for a couple of years now, coupled with our experience weighed heavily in the final decision. 

I am sure this feels like a kick in the teeth for Alek Bédard and Team, our 2020 Brier representatives. They would have made for fine representatives this year as well, but the selection committee seems to have placed more weight on the fact that we have been the #1 ranked team for a few years now.  Was this the right choice? Who knows.  As I said in an earlier blog, there is no fair way to “pick” a provincial representative. Obviously, I am a bit biased, but I think we are a good choice, and I am grateful for the opportunity.

***

Now I have to figure out a way to practice despite a lockdown. I was practicing almost daily up until January 8th, but since then our government has continued to keep curling in lockdown, no exceptions! 

I am not "allowed" to practice anywhere. I have had to become a practice ninja, stealthily stealing practice hours when nobody is watching on vacant fields of ice. If you have a backyard skating rink for your kids – beware! the practice ninja might strike in your yard soon!!! 

*** 

 I have been reading a lot on-line from people asking if we should even try to hold a Brier or a Scotties amidst the chaos of a pandemic.  Opponents make a number of compelling arguments:

·       It is not fair. This is true. Some provinces have 2-week quarantine periods upon returning form the Brier, making it impractical for many amateur curlers who would need to skip 2 weeks of work upon their return. Teams like Krista McCarville have backed out, and nobody can blame them.

·       We are putting people at risk. This event will require players, volunteers, TSN crews, and others to travel, at a time when travel carries risk.

·       We are taking up testing and health care resources, at a time when most places do not have any to spare.

·       Restrictions in many provinces (including mine) are keeping the participants off the ice, so many teams will show up cold, without having thrown a rock in a couple of weeks or even months.

I get it. There are a pile of good reasons to cancel or delay the event.

But I say: screw it, let’s do it.

I think by March, we are all going to need something to distract us. Winter is long in Canada. If you are like me, you are so sick of watching Netflix that the chime that comes on when you open it makes my eye twitch. Geez, I even watched Bridgerton last week. Do you know how desperate for entertainment I needed to be to watch a show based on Jane Austen meets the Bachelor? I hate Jane Austen novels, and I hate the Bachelor, imagine both together. And yet I watched it. I am counting the days until I am able to watch the Scotties!

Canada needs the Brier. I am struck by the number of fans who have reached out to me to tell me how they will be glued to their TVs in March. In a nation of millions of curling fans, we need this. Winter is long, and by March we will be even more fed up with lockdowns, restrictions and social distancing. 

Curling needs the Brier. This is an opportunity for the game to pick up a new audience. People are ravenous for something to watch. A Brier that is even half as compelling as last year will surely garner some new eyeballs, and provide the sport a much-needed shot in the arm (excuse the term!).

Sure, it could all turn to shit if only one poor soul brings that nasty virus into our fragile bubble, but I still think it is worth the risk. The safety and testing protocols I have seen so far seem exhaustive. I think the bubble is way less risky than my grocery run to Costco on a Saturday morning. Fingers crossed.

 ***

 

I wanted to end with a few sincere thankyous.

First to Curling Canada and Curling Quebec (and all the Provincial Associations), who have both worked incredibly hard to make lemonade from a pile of rotten, stinky lemons. This is certainly not easy for anyone, and the work they have done to keep things moving is remarkable.

Thanks to our sponsors for their ongoing support. Hardline, RBC, Cedar Springs, Dynasty, Injection Classique and Wesdome. We have fancy new jackets with our sponsors’ logos on them that unfortunately will likely not see a single game this year. At least they are ready for next season!

I also need to thank the folks at Glenmore, Val d’Or and Victoria Curling Club for keeping their ice in for practice with the hopes of resuming a season. It would have been easier for these clubs to close their doors back in October or November as many clubs have done when the second wave hit, but a few employees and many volunteers worked tirelessly to keep things going. This has made it possible for us to be as prepared as possible for what is to come. Thank you!

The Brier is Broken! (and other Fake News)

Somehow, the debate on the format of the Brier/Scotties has bubbled to the surface amidst this pandemic. Once again, the debate of what the Brier is, and how we should qualify teams for our National championship has been the subject of podcasts and newspaper articles.

Curling Canada, understandably desperate to run its most lucrative events has scheduled a Brier and a Scotties to be held in a NHL-style bubble.

Some curlers and media types have emerged from isolation to suggest that Curling Canada should use this occasion to finally eliminate all the weaker teams from the Brier and just invite the top 10 or 16 CTRS teams in the country. The current format guarantees a spot at the Brier for each of Canada's provinces and territories. Changing the format to the top 16 would eliminate many of the smaller provinces that do not have a team in the top 16 (including Quebec!). The proponents of this change would hope to make it permanent.

The arguments I have heard in favor of eliminating the quaint idea of provincial representation go something like this:

• The first few days of the Brier are crap, and nobody watches because there are too many crappy teams from crappy provinces in the field.
• Good young teams in tough provinces never get a chance to be at the Brier, depriving them of the fame and glory that come from curling’s biggest stage (other than the Olympics)
• Teams now cross provincial boundaries; many of the top teams are made up of players from across the country, so why should we still define teams by provinces?

The Inside Curling Podcast, featuring Kevin Martin and Warren Hansen, which I really enjoyed at its onset, has now shifted to pretty much every week inviting guests on to discuss how to “fix” the Brier. They paint anyone who actually likes the current format into the corner of being “against change”, or at very least as failing to see the evolving demographics that drive the game.

Let me say this clearly: Abandoning the provincial structure will kill the Brier.

To understand this debate, you need to understand that the current world of curling has split into Pros versus Joes. If we go back 20 or 30 years, there was no such thing as a “pro” curler. When I got out of juniors, I would never have considered a career in curling (not that I was that good anyway). Even the very best curlers I knew went to university, or got jobs. We were all Joes, not Pros.

Today, thanks to the Olympics, the World Curling Tour and Grand Slams, elite curlers can now make a modest living at the game. Make no mistake, there are no millionaires in curling (or if there are, they likely made their money elsewhere), but the top 4 or 5 teams in the country can likely “get by” on what they make from winnings, sponsorship/endorsements and Olympic funding for the elite few. Even then, many of the top teams still find themselves working summer construction contracts, running side-hustles or actual businesses to make the mortgage payments and support their families.

Pretty much the entire competitive curling world now revolves around these elite 4-5 teams in Canada, who are now joined by the top 10 international teams from around the world that get together to play in the Grand Slams. The Grand Slams are high payout, Sportsnet-covered exhibits of the best curling in the world. They have been successful at allowing the top teams in the world to play each other on a regular basis, and the Slams provide the funding for them to continue doing so. Beyond the Slams, the Canada Cup (run by Curling Canada) now provides an event for the top 8 teams in Canada to play for some big money and a berth in the Olympic Qualifying.

This system has emerged as the way to support the elite curlers that aspire to play in the Olympics. The Slams are an exclusive club that is incredibly tough for young and emerging teams to break into. The rankings are stacked to favour the teams already in the Slams, meaning that teams outside of the top 7 or 8 in Canada need to play in about 20 events per year all over the world with the hope of getting enough points in the smaller events to crack the elite.

While the Slams and the Olympics have done a good job at supporting the top teams, they have helped all but kill competitive curling at  the level below. This system has all but eliminated the “middle class” of curling. The Tier 2 events shrink in both number and importance every season. 20 years ago, over a thousand teams would enter to get to the Brier, now that number is now in the low hundreds. The money has filtered to the top. For teams outside the elite 7-8 in Canada, the climb to reach the top tier is just too steep. 

So why do teams keep playing? What keeps the Joes from packing it in, and just playing in club-level curling? Why do teams like mine keep working and practicing?

The answer, at least for now, is the Brier.

The Brier is special. Whereas the deck is permanently stacked against the Joes when they try to climb the world rankings, getting to the Brier has always been egalitarian. The Pros have to beat the Joes to get there. John Epping has to win Ontario. Gushue has to win Newfoundland. They have to beat all comers. Anyone willing to enter the ring and pay the modest entry fee can take a shot at it. Some say that this is unfair; that the top teams deserve to automatically get an invitation to the nation’s biggest event. I see their point, but there is certain charm to the notion that this is the one event with no free rides. You have to win your province.

Is this a raw deal for teams from Alberta, Manitoba and Ontario? Absolutely, it always has been. But there are perks to curling in Canada’s curling meccas; you get better games, better instruction, you have spiels in your backyard that help you get boatloads of CTRS points, and you regularly get to test your skills against the best, which makes you better. Curling in Alberta, Ontario or Manitoba has its advantages to offset the tougher road to the Brier.

This higher level of competition is evident when you look at the curling world today. Bottcher has gotten better in part by taking his lumps against Koe.  Epping gets no free pass to the Brier, he knows he has to beat Howard, MacDonald and some other teams that will likely never make the Brier, but are damn good. Being from a strong province makes you better. Yes, it will be tougher to get to the Brier, but hey as Tom Hanks said in a League of Their Own: It’s the hard that makes it great.

I would not suggest that the current Brier format is perfect, but can we at least acknowledge that at least part of the magic of the Brier is the provinces, the colours, the flags, and the regional charm of our nation put on display for all to see?

Can we acknowledge that turning the Brier into another exclusive Slam will all but kill curling in a number of smaller provinces? Try cracking the top 15 in Canada if you play out of New Brunswick or Nova Scotia. The CTRS (Canadian Team Ranking System) inevitably favors teams from the West. If you live out East, in order to climb the world rankings you would need to be on a plane pretty much every weekend from September to December, trying to get to the higher-payout CTRS events in Ontario or out West. The additional travel time and cost make it all but impossible. 

Provincial representation gives teams in smaller provinces a reason to keep playing competitively. It gives them a reason to get better. Yes, it inconveniences the top 5-10 teams in the country, but it serves to drive the next 100 teams. 

The best team in the country right now is from Newfoundland. NEWFOUNDLAND!  The national champs are from an isolated, far-east province of a half a million people. If ever there was a perfect argument to let all the provinces play - that would be it. Who knows where the next great team may be from? Maybe the Yukon? Maybe there is some 12-year-old kid sitting in New Brunswick that will be dominating the game 15 years from now. 

So let me now acknowledge that I am completely biased in this debate. As I write this, I am currently ranked 19th in the country, so changing the Brier would likely exclude me from the mix. As the expression goes, its usually tough to get the turkeys to vote in favor of Thanksgiving. So my case for the current Brier is very much in my own self-interest. But heck, I am 49. I clearly do not have many Briers ahead of me, regardless of the format.  I just feel that someone needs to speak for the many competitors from across the country who now find themselves on the outside, and who might soon find themselves excluded from our National Curling Championship.

So what about the current format?

Is it perfect? Hell no, but it makes an effort at walking the fine line between provincial representation and elite pro curling.

Yes, you have teams from PEI, Nunavut, the Yukon, Northwest Territories, the Maritimes and Quebec who are not likely to win (but you also have a Wildcard and Team Canada).

Yes, it means a few very good teams will find themselves sitting at home in March watching because they happen to live in a tough province.

Yes, it means you have some mismatches early in the week.

Yes, it means you have to have complicated residency rules that will inevitably result in curlers dancing between provinces.

Yes, all of this is true, but the Brier works anyway. The Brier last year was awesome. It is by far my favorite TV event to watch, even if the curling at the Slams is better. And it was fun to watch all week: the early week provided gems like the Gunnlaugson shot to beat PEI, and Dunstone making a quad to beat BC. Both of these were early in the week, against provinces that likely would not be there if the format was changed. 

The Brier is Canada. It is a collection of very different people from all over the country, whose love of the game brings them together for 10 special days in March. If we start excluding parts of the country, it would be like amputating the very soul of the event.

Bubblewrap the Horses!

This week my illustrious ex-third Alanna Routledge shared a photo from our 2012 Mixed Nationals that reminded me just how much I miss curling. (And reminded me of that unfortunate trend to wear crazy pants)

This was Mixed Nationals in Montreal, which honestly still ranks as one of the top weeks of my curling life. It was an absolute blast from start to finish, and reminded me of what I cherish deeply about the sport. It was competitive, but it was social. I feel like I have friends from across the country because of that week. It was inclusive. It was immersive. Thinking about it still makes me smile.

It has also reminded me of how much I miss curling. I have done nothing but practice since March, as spiel after spiel has fallen victim to this damn pandemic. I get it, and I know it will end someday. 

I have also been relatively quiet on the blog lately, much in the way you don’t want to pull off a band-aid on a wound that you know is still festering, I have not wanted to think about all that I am missing so much. Yes, I have been practicing – a lot - but without any tournaments to play in it feels like going to the driving range without the feeling of ever getting out on the golf course.

But this week has brought news: news of 2021 Brier! (and a Scotties and a Mixed Doubles, and some Slams). Curling Canada has pulled a rabbit out from their hats, and created a Season of Champions to be held in March in what will be a Calgary Bubble, at the Olympic site. 

This is honestly an impressive feet. Curling is not the NHL or the NBA. While I am sure the potential of sellable TV content is appealing, the cost of running something like this, both in dollars and coordination is immense. I am honestly blown away that CC has been able to pull this off. Big kudos to the folks at Curling Canada.

Of course, this will not come without controversy. 

The first question of course will be how to pick the teams that will attend. With curling shut down in all but a few provinces, how will provincial associations be able to run events to select a champion? For sure, many provinces will find themselves unable to hold a provincial championship, so they will be in the unenviable position of having to pick a winner to send into the bubble.

So how do you decide how to pick a team to go to the Brier? I see three possible models:

1) Send last year’s winner. Amazingly, this option is supported by 100% of last year’s winners.

2) A beauty contest: You line up your teams, and you have some appointed judges pick a winner. I guess the trick is in appointing the right judges.

3) American Idol:  Have some sort of vote, presumably of the players and/or curling associations to decide. Let the people decide!

So solution 1 is pretty clear cut, but presents problems when last year’s winning team is no longer curling together (as is the case in the Quebec Women’s scene). Also, if last year's winner was an upset, many of the provincial favorites will be left out.   

Solution 2 and 3 become problematic due to politics. 

Either way, teams will have to lobby to get to the Brier. This is a new skill set for many teams, who used to try to get to the Brier by actually practicing and getting better at curling. I don't remember a chapter on lobbying for support in my copy of “Curling to Win”. In option 3, you would have to pander for votes, and cries of "Voter Fraud" from south of the border might make their way north.   

Either way, this will be messy, and controversial. I think making this work will require acceptance of the fact that these are all crappy solutions, and eventually we will have to go with the least crappy one.

I sincerely hope the pandemic eases up and we get to play in some form of a limited provincial. Those who know me know how much I value a trip to the Brier. I am a purist, a lover of the sport, so there is something about giving anyone a free pass for what I have worked so hard towards in the past just feels wrong. 

However, if in Quebec it comes down to Option 2 (the Beauty Contest), then Team Fournier will sport our swimsuits and walk the runway in hopes of getting the judges to give us the Team Quebec tiara! Wish us luck, or “happy lobbying”, I guess.

***

Of course Warren Hansen has already suggested that the Brier seize this opportunity to “evolve” into the Canada Cup, inviting only the top 10 ranked CTRS teams. I guess I am a bit (okay - a lot) biased here, but what a crappy idea. 

I have been listening to Kevin Martin and Warren Hansen’s podcast a bit.  I can tell you that I hold a great deal of reverence and respect for both of these gentlemen. Kevin is the originator of the Slams and was the main guy behind the players tour. Warren is one of the fathers of the move to the Olympics and the Season of Champions, and both have helped develop and grow the sport around the World. I also do not question their intentions; I think they both believe that what they are pushing for is in the best interest of “the game”. I just do not agree with what they propose as the next evolutionary steps for our game.

They both talk about the Brier being “broken” and the need for it to change. And they are not completely wrong. The current format creates problems due to its inclusiveness: there are too many teams that do not stand a chance. The Province-based approach to the Brier no longer reflects the reality of the Uber-teams that combine stars from multiple provinces together. But how do we fix it? 

I guess my beef with their approach is that it always seems to focus on the few. It looks to identify the best curlers, tag them and then make the system work for them, and them alone. I get this approach, I just do not agree with it.  I see this model across other sports, from kids hockey and soccer, to education. It goes like this: Let’s try to make the game better by improving those at the top of the pyramid. Those who devote the time and have the talent deserve to reap the benefits, and for the rest we will create a Tier B championship. Their solution is to have a Brier for the Top 10 teams in the country, because that is what the people want to see.  (although I am not sure who these “people” are). 

Basically, this is the “trickle-down economics” theory about how to grow curling. Throw money and coaching at the elite curlers, and the benefits will trickle-down to grow the sport of curling for all. However, much like trickle-down economics, this has not really worked out well for anyone except the elite. “Tier 2”  competitive curling has all but died in Canada, and participation in pretty much all competitive levels is now just a fraction of what it was 20 years ago. Yes, the best have gotten better, but a small handful of pro teams receive the lion’s share of the rewards. Competitive Curling outside of the Slams has just about died – and Covid surely will not help.

I believe in building the base. The more we have teams across the country who get exposure at a National level, the more the sport can grow. How would excluding New Brunswick, Nova Scotia, Quebec, BC, PEI, and the Territories from the Brier help grow the game in these places? Have we just given up, and relegated ourselves to the eventual end of regional presence at the Brier? Will the Brier work if it becomes just an 8th Slam?

By no means is this easy. There are no quick solutions. 

I just hope the Pandemic is not the excuse used to transform the mighty Brier into just another Slam.

Curling (or not curling) in the Red Zone

 

A Curling Blog from the Red Zone

 Welcome to “La Zone Rouge”, which I used to think was the name of the strip bar in Val d’Or. It is now the name associated with the parts of Quebec most impacted by the Coronavirus. With over 1000 new cases of Covid-19 per day, Montreal, Quebec City and a few other parts of the province have gone into full Code Red lockdown, meaning more restrictions and likely no curling in much of the province.

My home club, Glenmore, spent the month of September installing and preparing the ice, hoping that the season could start next week. However, new restrictions expected in the next few days would more than likely put the brakes on that. Curling Clubs in higher risk areas of the country are now faced with the tough choice between operating in a revenue-reduced, uncertain environment and just shutting the doors until next season. I am hearing many Toronto-area clubs have thrown in the towel and shut down until at least January. I suspect many Quebec clubs will end up doing the same, but I guess it will depend on the next few weeks. The reality of the virus is that it will always be worse in areas of the country that are densely populated and that rely more heavily on public transportation. This actually bodes well for curling in general, as it is a sport that thrives in the more rural parts of the country. But big cities like Toronto and Montreal will face a tough year, and might not see curling at all.

 

Competitive curling is a different story. I can’t begin to tell you how frustrating it is as a competitive curler to be sitting in my living room watching live streams of curling tournaments from other parts of the world less impacted by the virus. We have now been off the ice since early March, and the earliest we could possibly play would be November. I have not thrown a rock in 6 months. We were signed up to play in Ottawa in September, which was canceled as well as a few Quebec based events in October that have also been axed. We had signed up for one of the events being held in Kitchener-Waterloo, but our government has put a “do not travel” advisory in place, and in theory we are not supposed to travel out of our Red Zone. So we are out of luck, and likely not playing until November at best.

At this point I'm not sure what the competitive season will look like. Will there even be a Brier or Scotties this year? Curling Canada is likely reviewing its options and trying to find a way to hold a TV-only event in bubble.  This would surely be good for curling-starved fans who have had nothing but a few streamed events to satiate their desire to see quality curling. But how do you run a Brier with conditions as they are? Do curlers need to show up 2 weeks before to test/isolate? Would they allow a team from a “Hot Zone” to enter? Clearly, the logistics are not simple in this, and even the best-laid plan would be ravaged by a single positive test. The NHL and NBA have been able to maintain their bubbles and run playoffs, but obviously, they do not operate under the same financial realities as curling. I expect announcements to come in the next few weeks.

The Slams are canceled until 2021, and the accumulation of points for World rankings or Olympic Qualifying has been put on hold. Some events have started with tournaments across the country, but teams are playing just to stay sharp and to be ready for when the music starts up again.

All in all, this sucks.  

I guess at times like these, a bit of perspective is required. Curling is just a game. It is not life or death. People are dying from this disease. A winter without curling is not the end of the world, especially in if it is in the name of saving lives, or keeping our hospitals from overflowing. But as this isolation continues, and after 6 months of dealing with this shit, this void is laying bare to me the role that curling has played in my life. Maybe some time away from the game will help me come back to it with increased perspective and appreciation.  

In the meantime, I will golf until it snows. I will play soccer in the park. I will work. I will try to keep my wife and kids safe and sane. And I will miss curling.

Some non-curling content:

I am still on Facebook, mostly to get curling news and post family pics. But man, some of the shit I am seeing from people I know is troubling. I know we are nowhere near the US level of polarization and stupidity, but I see stuff that I finding tough to ignore.

First, there is the garden variety stupid: anti-mask, government conspiracy, Coronavirus is a hoax bullshit. Thankfully this gets a low-level of traction here. I have not personally seen anyone throwing a mask tantrum in a store or restaurant. I am sure it happens, but it does not seem widespread.

Then there is the “This makes no sense – the government is wrong”. I am in no way saying the government is never wrong and should never be questioned, but to say you know better because you are now an expert because of the hours you have spent watching Youtube is misguided. The fact is, we do not know better.

There is the danger of falling into the fallacy of common sense. Thinking that there is a simple solution to get us out of this, and if the government just implemented this then we would be fine.

There is no easy way out. The next year or so will be many policy decisions that feel like we are pressing on the gas and the brakes at the same time. There will be one step forward sometimes followed by two steps back. In Quebec, our government has asked us to stop socializing, but has kept schools open. Restaurants and bars are closed, but hair and nail salons are open. There will always be some restriction that is inconsistent as the government struggles to draw lines in the sand amidst changing conditions.

All we can do is try to follow the rules as best we can, and understand that the only way to keep this thing in check short of a vaccine is collective action. So wash your damn hands and wear a mask. Oh, and stop socializing, especially indoors.

Can this N95 Mask Keep me from Smelling Farts on the Ice?

Team Fournier (aka Team Horses) held a rather depressing meeting last week (via Zoom of course) to discuss the upcoming curling season.

We had such a fun season planned. We have a new player, we have great sponsors, we have a keen coach, we have new sexy uniforms. All the pieces are in place.

Except we also have a virus. Covid-19 is already wreaking havoc on the competitive curling world. The Slams have been cancelled; the points systems that drive World rankings and Olympic qualifications have been suspended until November (at least) and most big events that involve crowds (like the Brier) are surely questioning whether they can even happen this year.

If you look at our planned schedule for the season, we had planned to go to Halifax, Alberta, Toronto, New Brunswick. I now question whether these places will even accept us as visitors, given that I happen to live on the island that has been the Covid hotspot in the country.

A lot people are suggesting that curling is a great social distancing sport, like golf. In theory, the other team does not need to be anywhere near the ice when the other team is throwing. However, as anyone who has ever curled with or against Dale Ness or Eve Bélisle knows, the air in a curling rink does not circulate quickly.  And you are basically sharing the same damp air with everyone else on the ice for a few hours. I am not sure if masks would keep you from spreading the virus.

Beyond the safety issues, there is also the question of money. Curling, despite its TV popularity, is not baseball, or hockey. There is no way to do curling the way other major sports have undertaken it. There will be no curlers living in a resort bubble, mainly because apart from a handful of teams, we all have day jobs. Major sports have resumed with the help of expensive testing and re-testing, and travel can happen via private jets, which is of course beyond the budget for all but a couple of teams.  

So where does that leave our team? We will play closer to home for the first part of the season, and then see where we are in November. I hope that the threat of the virus will be diminished, and we will venture out further (likely with our masks on) to try to play and get better and prepare for Provincials in January. If travel restrictions and rules against gatherings are lifted, then the season can start to look something like a normal curling season.

So in the meantime, wear your mask and keep your distance!

What about club curling?

I have no idea.

Glenmore (my home club) will likely open. I do not know what curling will look like. I think most of the membership will be eager to get back on the ice. Unfortunately, it would just take one case to close us down. A big part of my enjoyment from curling unfortunately comes from post-game socializing, which will probably be limited at best, non-existent at worse. But at this point, a little curling would be infinitely better than no curling, so I will venture out into whatever the season brings.

***

If you are a fan of curling, you need to be listening to the Kevin Martin / Warren Hansen podcast. Having Kevin and Warren do a podcast together is like having Karl Marx debating Ayn Rand; its like GSP debating Connor McGregor. They both have such a deep and passionate love for the game and its history, but Kevin and Warren have always been on opposite sides when it comes to discussing the game’s future. (It is called “Inside Curling” and is available wherever you find podcasts!)

Warren has been the leader of developing the Curling Canada events – such as the Brier, the Scotties and the Olympic Trials. Kevin has been the main force behind the creation of the “Pro” tour, i.e. the Grand Slams and the World Curling Tour. Putting the two together is fascinating.

Amazingly, the passage of time has brought them much closer together, and they now both see the inevitability of splitting up the “pros” from the “joes”. They have some interesting perspectives on where the game is going, on how the US and Asia will be driving the evolution of the sport. I often find myself in violent disagreement with both of them, but I have to say the blog has made me respect these guys even more than I did before. Moreover, they share many great stories from the wilder days of curling that I remember fondly. I think this podcast is one good thing that has emerged from this stupid pandemic.

I am not sure for how long they can keep it up; I am amazed they have gotten 16 episodes done so far without being too repetitive. So it is definitely worth a listen. Way better than Tiger King!

"Dad, Russ Howard is Licking Himself Again!!!" An Isolation Blog

After 6 weeks of isolation, I have come to the inescapable conclusion that I miss curling.

I miss throwing practice rocks. I miss the taste of a pre, post or mid-game rye and coke. I miss my teammates, both my competitive guys and by hall-of-fame great club team.

I miss staying a bit too late after a Tuesday game. I miss throwing a few extra draws at the end of my lunchtime practice to make me a bit late for a meeting at work. I miss showing up early for a ladder game, and hanging out at the end of the bar listening to whoever had a curling story to tell about their weekend. I miss gossiping with the club manager. I miss the Glenmore Intermediate, an event that usually would have occurred last weekend and would have helped ease the transition into spring with the help of dancing, karaoke, Jello shots and late night poutine runs (and curling).

After our competitive season comes to its end, (unfortunately in January for the past 2 seasons) I curl from February to April only because I love it. And losing it this year has made me appreciate it that much more.

All that to say that I miss curling.

Of course, I miss other things too, like leaving my house, seeing friends or playing soccer. But with curling, next season just seems so far away, and I am not sure I will have my usual summer distractions of golf, soccer and the city pool to keep me busy until then.

***

The question everyone seems to be asking themselves these days is when this will get back to “normal”. When we will be able to enjoy the things we did before, without feeling like we need a hazmat suit? And what will next curling season look like?

I do not profess to know for sure, nor do I have any inside information on this, but here is my take:

First, we will not have vaccine by the fall, and most of us will not have had the virus yet. Therefore, a big part of the population will remain vulnerable. Therefore there is no way things will be back to normal. Sorry to be bearer of bad news if you had hopes of this ending soon, but it won’t.  

I think we will have a season next year. But it will be vastly different that what we have seen before.

On the competitive side, I cannot envision travel getting back to what it was before. Teams from all around the world were flying across Canada from September to May to curl. There is no way this can happen next season. Curlers are like traveling germ salespersons, and as the virus flares up in different parts of the country, travel restrictions will inevitably follow. Travel will need to be much more sporadic, and more teams will be playing more spiels that are within driving distance, and in their own cities and provinces.

While the slams and big events will happen, I think we might see them being smaller, and played without crowds for TV only. The fact is, a big part of curling audiences are older, and those people will be less likely to want to gather in arenas to watch. Holding events for TV will involve a different set of economics for the game, but the reality is that TV is still where the big money is, and curling on TV without spectators will be better than no curling at all. Will the Brier be the Brier? I have no idea.

At the club level, curling will happen but with a strict set of rules. Ice techs will be wiping off rocks with Lysol every game, it will become part of doing the ice. The pre and post game handshakes will be things of the past, and I am not sure if we will be sitting together after games. I really hope I’m wrong here, but the idea of eight people sitting around shoulder to shoulder, especially given that about 30-40% of our ladder is of senior age, seems unlikely. At very least, many will stay away. If you were a member of a struggling curling club before, I would worry about their capacity to survive next season, given that bar revenues will be down and some more vulnerable members will not want to join.

Whatever happens, it will certainly be different, and will feel mighty weird. But I much prefer a weird curling season to none at all, so we will all have to adapt.

***

So how is the isolation going you ask?

I think we are all getting a bit squirrelly in the Fournier household. 

I ran out of rye today, and the lineup at the SAQ was around the block, so I have resorted to drinking the little mini-bar samples I have collected over the years. I found a mini bottle of Screech I got from Team Newfoundland from the 1996 Canadian Mixed Championship. It was spectacular, and made me yearn for a fish to kiss.

My wife and I are both fortunate enough to still be employed, and are working from our home office while simultaneously failing miserably at home schooling our kids. Like many of you I often take videoconferences in pyjama bottoms, and am perpetually getting interrupted. I took a call from my boss last week while dodging Nerf gun bullets. 

But I still consider us as “lucky” as we still have jobs for the time being. And for those of you on the front lines dealing with this every day, I have nothing to say but a sincere thank you.

Sure sign the isolation is getting to me: last week we decided to adopt two cats after succumbing to ridiculous pressure tactics from my daughters. Sadly, they already had names, and I could not convince my daughters to rename them after famous curlers.  

Having my daughters say:  “Mom, Kevin Martin coughed up a hairball and Russ Howard peed next to the litterbox again” would have made my week, but alas, no. They are Seema and Stedman, pictured here.

Did I mention I miss curling?